"In the depths of winter, I found in me an invincible summer.
...and summer in the real world involves a job with benefits." :)
-Albert Camus (*Thank You Sam)
It's been about two months, approximately, since leaving UCLA. 1 month since I've come back from home. Yo quiero cortar. One month it took me to decide that next week I move to Los Angeles for good. It was time, I had been lying around on the couch looking specifically for full time jobs in my area of speciality. Entry level, part-time, nothing.
It was only once I moved that about three weeks ago things started to come up. They were all part-time that a high school education could have provided me. So what the heck, I need the money I took all that I can, went to job interview after job interview for restaurants. Why this place, because I walked by one once and saw a beautiful hostess laughing, and another friend who brings home food and takes home tips. I was friendly enough, and dressed as if I had a date with a buisnessman. The interviews (plural) went well.
This week I started with a very friendly atmosphere that offered 10/hr plus tips and benefits. Part-time of course, because I also had an internship that paid nothing. Plus I still had work at the Boba place in a little Asian district near my house.
I found another restaurant that I can work at right after my internship and it seemed perfect. They hired me today... Yo quiero cortar.
Depression sucks because essentially you just have to deal with it. That's it. Deal with it. What does that mean? I laid flat on a pillow crying because I wasn't perfect and I make mistakes. I don't want to seem like someone who makes mistakes, I don't want the world to see me like that.
Yesterday, I ran into a job interview late and sweating with half an hour to get to training for a new job next door. The hiring manager took all those thirty minutes so I had to go. As much as I have called her, she hasn't called me since.
Today, I thought was my day off for training, I didn't look at the schedule, I simply assumed. (I'm accountable, yo quiero cortar). They called asking where I was, it was my third day on the job, so they rescheduled for tomorrow.
I also got hired at the restaurant near my internship. Yo quiero cortar, I had to reschedule with them twice when they told me today after my interview that I was to start. Again, my fault, I told them I can start ASAP. I told them the situation, that I had to work tomorrow. They said they'd call back. Never happened.
Why have I come to such conclusion? Every interview I have had with them they have called me two hours after to schedule another interview or to follow-up. I'm smart I can read actions. They simply needed someone who wasn't bogged down. After all this would be my fourth job, but they didn't know that, they only knew I had an internship and another restaurant job. No boba. Essentially no call, means no interest.
My dad says I
should call tomorrow, like I should still care about it. It's so much easier to forget and walk away, then to linger onto hope. Hope, in these cases, is a dead end. You may ask why I have to do this to myself. Try to work 4 jobs. Simply its is my pride. I cannot say enough about how my parents love me, but I don't want to burden them with more money troubles. My dad is already scheduled to lose his job in October. I shouldn't tell you that though, it is a shame to reveal secrets. Yo quiero cortar.
So to pay rent and food and bills, I must resort to this. My pride is hurt that my awards and accolades that garner the bottom of my resume are mere embarrasments to reveal.
Okay, graduated Cum Laude, Phi Beta Kappa, at a presigious University, and I'm working minimum wage at a specialty drink store serving other students and working as a hostess near campus. Wow, imagen when school starts and the undergrads familiar with me see me seat them to their table. Screw all my achievements. Today I got hired and fired and already missed my first day of work. I can go on and on of such incompetence.
Voy a cortar but I wrote this instead.
...and summer in the real world involves a job with benefits." :)
-Albert Camus (*Thank You Sam)
It's been about two months, approximately, since leaving UCLA. 1 month since I've come back from home. Yo quiero cortar. One month it took me to decide that next week I move to Los Angeles for good. It was time, I had been lying around on the couch looking specifically for full time jobs in my area of speciality. Entry level, part-time, nothing.
It was only once I moved that about three weeks ago things started to come up. They were all part-time that a high school education could have provided me. So what the heck, I need the money I took all that I can, went to job interview after job interview for restaurants. Why this place, because I walked by one once and saw a beautiful hostess laughing, and another friend who brings home food and takes home tips. I was friendly enough, and dressed as if I had a date with a buisnessman. The interviews (plural) went well.
This week I started with a very friendly atmosphere that offered 10/hr plus tips and benefits. Part-time of course, because I also had an internship that paid nothing. Plus I still had work at the Boba place in a little Asian district near my house.
I found another restaurant that I can work at right after my internship and it seemed perfect. They hired me today... Yo quiero cortar.
Depression sucks because essentially you just have to deal with it. That's it. Deal with it. What does that mean? I laid flat on a pillow crying because I wasn't perfect and I make mistakes. I don't want to seem like someone who makes mistakes, I don't want the world to see me like that.
Yesterday, I ran into a job interview late and sweating with half an hour to get to training for a new job next door. The hiring manager took all those thirty minutes so I had to go. As much as I have called her, she hasn't called me since.
Today, I thought was my day off for training, I didn't look at the schedule, I simply assumed. (I'm accountable, yo quiero cortar). They called asking where I was, it was my third day on the job, so they rescheduled for tomorrow.
I also got hired at the restaurant near my internship. Yo quiero cortar, I had to reschedule with them twice when they told me today after my interview that I was to start. Again, my fault, I told them I can start ASAP. I told them the situation, that I had to work tomorrow. They said they'd call back. Never happened.
Why have I come to such conclusion? Every interview I have had with them they have called me two hours after to schedule another interview or to follow-up. I'm smart I can read actions. They simply needed someone who wasn't bogged down. After all this would be my fourth job, but they didn't know that, they only knew I had an internship and another restaurant job. No boba. Essentially no call, means no interest.
My dad says I
should call tomorrow, like I should still care about it. It's so much easier to forget and walk away, then to linger onto hope. Hope, in these cases, is a dead end. You may ask why I have to do this to myself. Try to work 4 jobs. Simply its is my pride. I cannot say enough about how my parents love me, but I don't want to burden them with more money troubles. My dad is already scheduled to lose his job in October. I shouldn't tell you that though, it is a shame to reveal secrets. Yo quiero cortar.So to pay rent and food and bills, I must resort to this. My pride is hurt that my awards and accolades that garner the bottom of my resume are mere embarrasments to reveal.
Okay, graduated Cum Laude, Phi Beta Kappa, at a presigious University, and I'm working minimum wage at a specialty drink store serving other students and working as a hostess near campus. Wow, imagen when school starts and the undergrads familiar with me see me seat them to their table. Screw all my achievements. Today I got hired and fired and already missed my first day of work. I can go on and on of such incompetence.
Voy a cortar but I wrote this instead.
Thank you.
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